If I had to rate the trip off of the first two weeks, it would be a soft five. If I had to rate it on the last two weeks, it would exceed the scales.
The first half of the trip was kind of empty, dark, challenging, and all around kind of unfulfilling. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t feeling disappointed. I was not feeling the presence of the Holy Spirit and although we were serving, I didn’t feel Him filling up my cup.
I brought it up in our small groups and it seemed like everyone else felt the same way. So that day I pleaded that the Lord would intercede, find ways to use me in little or big ways, and that I would experience more of Him.
He answered almost immediately.
Before the trip I tried to think about what I specifically wanted to experience on this trip. The thought came to my mind about a week before the trip how awesome it would be to baptize somebody. So right then I asked the Lord that if it is His will, that He would use me in that way. That He would grant me the privilege and the pleasure to baptize somebody; anybody.
Fast forward to the day I was feeling drained; a close friend on the trip asked me that night if I would baptize her. For the next day and a half I was blown away at how God answered a very specific prayer of mine, and I was completely overwhelmed and lost for words.
Jesus says in Matthew 7:7;
“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.”
This is an easy passage to abuse, because we as entitled humans want everything and we think that if we ask from the Father in His name, He should bless us, but that is not entirely what Jesus is saying. He is implying that our desires are pure and that we are solely pursuing Him in what we want. When we ask for more of Him, or for Him to use us, or for Him to fill us up, by all means He will give us what we ask for, as long as our hearts are in check.
I asked God for something, and He answered big. I can’t begin to explain what it felt like to baptize someone, let alone a close friend. I was completely overwhelmed by the presence of the Lord and joy in my heart, that God would use me in that sort of way. He continues to overflow my cup and I am constantly left trying to understand why He is so good to me.
