The team was all ready. We had traveled hours up to this point and we were finally about to leave the States for Lima, Peru. This being my first mission trip, I had no idea what to expect. I didn’t think being homesick was actually a thing, especially when I hadn’t even been gone a week. I’m sitting in my plane seat, and the tears start rolling. Soon my breath becomes difficult and before I know it, I can’t breathe. I am in the midst of a full on anxiety attack and the plane hasn’t even taken off yet. The people around me think it’s because I’m afraid of flying when really I’ve flown plenty of times. Soon the entire flight team makes a visit to E34, including the pilot. They repeatedly ask if I’m okay. Followed by, “Are you sure? It’s a long flight?” Now I am doubting myself even more. I’m not equipped for this. There’s no way I am ready to preach to churches or share my testimony to crowds. There is even a moment I consider walking off that plane.
Then my team is around me. They all place their hands on me and boldly proclaim Gods truth over me. Nearby passengers and flight attendants are watching as my team cries out to God.
Now we are days away from leaving our Peruvian home, and I’ve learned that I was well equipped the entire time. The Lord has shown me that it was never my abilities that would determine how I impacted the people here. No matter the words I said, it was going to be God that would change these people’s hearts. I learned to hear Him and let him lead me this month. He was present in the moments when I didn’t have the words, and present in the moments when words weren’t needed.
I learned that God calls us to be bold. He calls us to be brave. He let’s us be uncomfortable in order to be more fully dependent on him for our comfort and our peace. When we ask to be his vessels he makes us just that. He is the one doing the work, and He is well equipped.
