Brace Yourself, Take a Deep Breath, and Pour

Brace yourself, take a deep breath, and pour. This was my ritual every morning during my four days at training camp before I dumped the first cup of freezing water over my head to start my bucket shower. If you haven’t tried a bucket shower, you really should. I don’t even know why we have hot showers in America, bucket showers build character for sure. The process goes as such: grab a five gallon bucket, fill it with a hose, carry/drag said bucket into an empty stall, close the curtain, pray it stays closed, fill up your first cup with water, and see the steps listed in the title for the rest.

Training camp and my first couple of days in Albania have been a series of events requiring me to brace myself, take a deep breath, and pour/ initiate another scary activity. My time on this trip has continually thrown me out of my comfort zone which has left me with mixed feelings of exhilaration, fear, occasional frustration, and absolute awe. From team building activities with the intention of putting us under pressure to see how we will react to learning to worship with complete abandon, God has firmly but gently asked me to pursue Him with every fiber of my being and submit to His perfect love.

For some people, that’s super easy. Some people don’t have to steel their nerves before jumping into something new or something that doesn’t seem very desirable. I’m one of those people that needs a second to convince my brain that what I’m about to do is worth the sacrifice. What God has ever-so-beautifully displayed to me so far is that He likes when I stop and decide for myself that He is worth being all in for. He is always worth the sacrifice. He is always worth trusting. In doing that, I stop blindly following the crowd.

I throw my hands up and dance in worship because I want to do it for Him, not because everyone else is. I speak truth into people’s lives because He has asked me to and I have a responsibility to my brothers and sisters, not because it seems like something I should do. I take time to sit with my Papa and rest in His truth because my souls needs it, not because it’s a chore I have to check off my list that day. Whatever it is that you have to take a second before you decide doing for God, take that second, and be confident in pouring out what He has given you to pour out.

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