Natz,
You are absolutely stunning. From your eyes appear black at a glance, but really are a deep,dark, captivating blue; you bless anyone who takes the time to peer into them. The large gap between your two front teeth is adorable. It is too rare that you smile, but when you do, it lights up the room. It is genuine, joyful, and innocent.
You spend a lot of time alone, timid and reserved, hesitant to speak, hesitant to play. You are so aware of your surroundings, the children around you, you really see them. Your eyes see the truth, and you are wise beyond your years. You are only five and you’ve seen too much.
Natz, you are a blessing to the world, you do not have to live small. You have permission to take up space. I break off any lies anyone has ever spoken over you. You are not the labels, you are not the lies;hardship does not define you. You are not less worthy on days when there are no shoes on your feet. I know that you don’t grasp the slightest how precious and beautiful you are my love. You do not yet understand that you are a daughter of God. You are a daughter of light and not darkness. You are an heir of God, you are not an orphan, and you were never created for this fallen world. You have a perfect father who loves every fiber of your being. You are holy and blameless in his eyes. I speak freedom over you. Freedom to laugh uncontrollably, freedom to run, to dance and play, to be happy, freedom to be a child.
It breaks my heart when you cling on to me, when I rock you and your grip is so tight, like it is the only time that you feel safe enough to just be, to just relax. Lord show yourself to Natz so she may feel this comfort even when she is alone.
I pray that she grows up confident in her identity in you, that she knows her worth. That with you, there are no limitations. Lord give her a deep hunger and desperation for you. That above all else she will have a desire to have relationship with you. I pray for healing, restoration, and health. I speak wholeness over her.
I lift up each of her future mentors, friends, community, send her people who know you Abba. Preserve her innocence.
Amen.
Thank you Natz for giving me a taste of what motherly love is, for expanding my capacity to love, and be loved by the Lord. For teaching me about my own worth and identity in Christ. To choose joy in the midst of struggle. The ways you have blessed me are endless. I am in awe of Him, that the amount of love I have for you looks measly compared to how endless and massive his love is.
I love you Natz, but you were never mine to keep, so I am surrendering you to our perfect father. It would be such a gift to see you on this earth again, but otherwise, I will see you in eternity.
Love and blessings,
Jessica
