Coming into this trip I know a couple things are for sure going to happen. 1. My life will be changed forever. 2. I’m going to have memories and stories for a life time. And 3. The weather will be a step up from Wisconsin (more like a whole staircase). I left home bragging about how I was going to be walking around in Chacos and t-shirts verses a winter jacket and mittens. I was quickly humbled by the fact we could barley see the mountains through the fog once we landed. YET, the fog didn’t blind us from the beauty behind it. How amazing is that illusion. Even though we arrived on a rainy day, we were still able to see the beauty through the gray, cloudy sky. The bright colored houses weren’t being lit by the sunlight, nor could we see past the trees driving through the mountains, but we could still witness the beauty within the fog.
I feel like that represents our relationship with God sometimes, especially in a time like this. A lot of us signed up for this trip not really asking ourselves the “What after?” question. The last couple months “our future” was this trip. We were planning, packing, praying for what was going to take place here. But after these three months of life changing experiences and intimate moments come to an end, what’s going to happen?
My freshman year of college was an absolute mess. In a 6 month span, I dropped out of two colleges in two different states. I left everything without a plan B… I knew I wasn’t suppose to be in school at that time and I knew I was suppose to come home, but I didn’t know why. I started to fill my time with friends and getting involved in any way I could to make myself busy, but in reality I just wanted to go to school and be like every other 18 year old. I doubted myself in almost every aspect. Doubted my choice to leave nursing, told myself I wasn’t smart enough to finish, firmly believed I was a failure. I needed to be reminded that there was a reason for Him wanting me home, that there was a reason I was behind everyone else my age and it wasn’t until this passport trip came to the surface that I actually believed it. The fog started to clear and I got to witness the beauty. I didn’t see it, but He did. He always does.
Personally, I don’t know what I’m doing after this. It’s fogged…but that’s okay!
I have the next three months to figure that one out. Thankfully I have Someone walking me through it!
