You know what’s really difficult? Constructive feedback. That stuff can be UNCOMFORTABLE.
For all my wonderful AIMians, you know exactly what I am talking about. For my lovely friends tuning in from your cars, workplace, and other places you do the phone thing but probably shouldn’t (squatties and such), here’s a quick little summary of what feedback is:
Positive feedback is calling out the greatness and Godliness your teammates see in you. (It’s all warm and fuzzy!)
Constructive feedback is Godliness that your teammates may see in you but would like to see more of in you. (Also warm and fuzzy! With claws like a bear! . . just kidding!)
Most people would take that to mean that constructive feedback is hurtful and a slap in the face. No. Feedback, whether positive or constructive, is a gift handed to you in love in hopes that you will prayerfully take it to the Lord and use it to grow more intimate with Him.
So back to what I was saying about constructive feedback being super awkward-feeling at times: Receiving feedback can sometimes feel like a confirmation to what you’ve known– “Oh, yeah I noticed that about myself today”– or it can feel like getting sidelined by a brick wall. “What? No way, that’s not me. Nope. You’re crazy.”
I personally don’t see why everyone can’t come to terms with me being perfect, but let’s move on (This is where you laugh. . . In case you couldn’t catch my advanced-level of sarcasm).
Yep, getting feedback can hurt sometimes. It can hurt even worse if you don’t receive it with the right attitude or take it to prayer.
Giving feedback is definitely the aspect of feedback I struggle with the most. Why does it matter what I think? Why would this person need to know that I saw something admirable in them? Why would they need to see this not-so-admirable trait in them? Who am I to try to call greatness out of someone or to compliment the Godliness I saw in someone when I’m no where near perfect.
“But God, my voice gets all shaky and I stutter a lot.” *GASP* “What if I hurt their feelings?” (You feel me, people pleasers?)
Feedback is definitely an acquired taste for most people. It takes work and practice. It can be uncomfortable; but feedback is one of the most rewarding things I have received on my trip and where I have seen most of my personal growth take place. This is where I have learned to trust my teammates. This is where we became a family and continue to grow closer with each session.
I definitely plan on implementing feedback in my daily routine back home amongst those who are closest to me and I trust to fight for me. It has so greatly impacted me on this trip that I know I will not be the same without it.
So quick reminder for those on their trip right now or getting ready to embark on a crazy adventure:
Feedback is your friend! (Even if it sometimes is like that annoying friend that gets under your skin when they give you wisdom that’s totally on point but your too stubborn to receive it. You know who I’m talking about!)
Don’t shy away from feedback. Embrace it and all of the messiness it brings you and your team. Welcome it in hopes that it will change you and bring growth to your life!
You’ll be glad you did!
Later ‘taters!
Karson
