Blogging is Hard

I think this is technically the end of week two. Per my usual, I’m not entirely sure what day it is, what time it is, or generally what’s going on. I genuinely thought it was Tuesday when I woke up this morning…it’s Friday.

Seriously though, how am I supposed to put a mountain of experiences into a couple of paragraphs? How much do y’all want to know? I could tell you how I love the tuffs of grass that poke through the pavement on the way to my favorite cafes. I could tell you how the call to prayer wakes me up everyday at 4:30am. I could tell you how my accountability partner let’s Saturday be my gluten cheat day. But what’s really worth sharing?

As I thought and thought and thought about what to write, it makes sense to share what I’ve learned. It also makes sense to give y’all at least a little glimpse of what my life looks like, mostly just for contexts sake. So here it goes!

The Christian center we serve in also acts as our home. During ministry hours our house is open to everyone -to talk, learn, jam, or just drink Rina’s coffee (which one never refuses, because it’s just that good). Personally, I haven’t taught any english yet but I have put myself to use making flyers and signs, and relaunching the center’s social media. So thankful for my internship last year that helped build those skills! Friday’s look a little different because it’s an outreach day. So far, we’ve gone into the city square and worshipped, played Sequence, gave out free coffee, passed out flyers, and talked. As quiet as I am, those are my favorite days. I’m more aware of how Father sees Skopje and it’s people on those days and yes, it breaks my heart. However, I can feel the light radiating from my team. I can see heaven in a game of Sequence and in a simple conversation and in the reach of a Facebook live. The city may be filled with darkness, but Father keeps reminding me that He hasn’t forgotten about this place. He’s definitely doing something amazing here, and I’m excited to take part in it.

In all honesty, I haven’t always been excited. This type of ministry is far outside my personality and comfort zone. Plus, I think it’s normal for someone to break down when placed in an entirely new situation. So I broke down for about two and a half days. My team took really good care of me, and I had a couple of friends from home praying over me. But now that I’m thinking about it, Father said something to me on Sunday night while I was reflecting on the past week. We were asked in team time to ask the Lord where He revealed Himself that week that we might not have noticed. You know what He brought to mind? The pizza I had the night before because it was cheat day with my accountability partner. Weird, yes, but this is what He said about it:

“I saw your joy [in eating my pizza] and, as small as it was, I celebrated with you.
I delight in little things too. Did you see how I covered your bones afterwards? You went through years without joy and I’m bringing it back to as you come closer and closer to me.”

My arthritis is the reason I’m gluten free, and I’ve been (surprisingly) good about it for awhile. So the pizza I had was a really big deal. I hadn’t realized that that night I wasn’t in any pain. He had covered my bones in grace. I don’t expect that every time I cheat, but now I have another reminder that He’s constantly taking care of me, even in little things like pizza.

I see that in the city of Skopje; there is joy and hope to be had here. Hopefully, no pun intended, my team can steward that. We’ve laid a foundation in intercession and courage, and I know we’re ready to continue in bringing light into darkness.

Now just to reiterate how hard blogging is, I’m not entirely sure how to end this…so I’m just gonna sign off and, since it’s now Saturday, I’m gonna go find a pastry!

Peace out,
Julz